Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Closing The Courtesy Hotel Is So Easy. . .

. . .Even A Cave Man Can Do It!

A Kate Murray, on the other hand. . . Well, that's not so easy.

[Open to a scene at West Hempstead's Venus Restaurant, where a caveman sits across the table from an indignant, pouting Town Supervisor. Both are staring at menu. Kate Murray looks up at caveman and begins to speak]

KATE: Your ad was totally insensitive and offensive.

CAVEMAN: Sorry, Kate, we didn’t realize you were still around…

WAITER: Would you like to order?

CAVEMAN: I'll have the cheeseburger deluxe, extra onions.

KATE: Frankly, I've lost my appetite. Just give me some of that MTBE water West Hempstead is so famous for.
[Kate’s cell phone rings. She picks it up.]
It’s my father, brother, and third cousin four times removed – all calling from their patronage jobs at Town Hall. I’ll put them on speaker…

CAVEMAN: Look, Kate, we just assumed, since you hadn’t closed the Courtesy, fixed the potholes in our streets, removed illegal basement apartments, improved the facades in our business districts, or cited the multitude of code violations along the Avenue and the Turnpike, that you were extinct.

KATE: (sarcastic) Sure, okay. I bring you garbage collection at four times the going rate, special taxing jurisdictions that bleed homeowners dry, and do everything I can to reinvent the wheel, no matter what the issue. Sorry I took so long getting these things to you.
[Fade to black]
* * * * *
SEND AN E-MAIL TO TOWN OF HEMPSTEAD SUPERVISOR KATE MURRAY. TELL HER TO COME OUT OF HER CAVE AND PADLOCK THE COURTESY! KateMurray@tohmail.org

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

THE SIGN WILL RETURN!
COUNT ON IT.